I wrote the following reflection a few years ago, some details in the reflection have also changed due to life circumstances but I do not want to change the reflection but rather than prefering keeping the orginal version of the reflection. The refelction is based mainly on my own experience, somewhat short-sighted I reckon, I wrote it purely for my own reflection during my spare time so that just reading it for fun 🙂
FEW NOTES TO SOME PEOPLE OF MY LIFE
Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never ever the same ~ Flavia Weedn.
There is a carer of a kinder garden who had left the kids to be with her boyfriend (What an irresponsible carer!) such that creating an opportunity for all other kids to start bullying me & biting my whole body with their teeth & leaving all tooth-shaped scars all over of my body & these scars wouldn’t totally go away until I finished high school & starting my uni life. Yet, they are the people whom I don’t think that I could recognize if I even have a chance to meet them in my nowadays busy life. Just so far away… Obviously, they are the people that I really don’t want to see from that time onwards. In times, I know that I will forgive them.
There was a teacher in charge of my year 9 & always complaining me in front of all my classmates to disgrace me because I was always against her arrogance, selfishness, discrimination & lack of friendly attitude towards her students especially the poor ones. Not only did she humiliate me but also she dishonored my mother, she always wanted to demonstrate to everybody how “bad” her daughter was. Obviously, her acts did hurt my mum so much & making her feel so ashamed about herself due to her “bad“ daughter. Definitely, my heart got angry, my blood turned cold & my mind became raged towards her such that I just wanted to her to disappear out of the life immediately. Just looking at how my mum had been hurt so much by her unscrupulous acts, you should soon realize how I felt towards that inhumane teacher. Honestly, she was the one whom I just don’t want to be ran into or seen any more though I have already forgiven her for her lack of love acts.
There were some classmates who always wanted to dishonor me because they always supposed they were the best and I was the worst. They were the one who always cheated in the exams to get highest marks to be ranked in the honor lists & lied in front of teacher-in-charge to be good students. They were the ones whom I always wanted to expose their 2-faced lives simply because they didn’t deserve what they got. Worse yet, they even distort my name to make me feel shameful whenever they called me & yes they called me more often just to let everyone know about their new invention. They were the ones who always tried to discover new terrible things to intentionally bully or hurt me in front of everyone but always tried to make the bullies as inadvertent happenings or random events. They were the ones who constantly tried their best to kick me out of our high school & forcing me to quit my studying at a really young age. Yet, they are the ones whose biggest achievement is HSC. I JUST CAN’T ERASE MY MEMORIES ABOUT YOU, I TRY TO FORGIVE YOU BUT IT IS JUST EXTREMELY HARD FOR ME TO FORGET ALL THINGS YOU HAVE DONE TO ME. FROM MY POINT OF VIEW, YOU ARE AMONG THE MOST SAVAGE CREATURES IN THE WORLD. However, some of them I could not be sure that I still recognize them if I ever have a chance to see them nowadays but they obviously are the ones with whom I could never befriend for sure.
There is a friend whom I have acquainted with during my high school & she is the one who had helped me to fulfill all of the knowledge that I had yet to catch up to be well-prepared for the HSC. Truly, she is the one who always patiently explained to me all of knowledge or lessons relating to mathematics or physics or chemistry … though it would took her a whole day to explain them to a stupid person like me. THANKS MY BEST FRIEND, I LOVE YOU. Though WE LIVE FAR AWAY FROM EACH OTHER & THE ONLY METHODS FOR US TO CONTACT ONE ANOTHER ARE EMAIL OR PHONE BUT I DO ALWAYS CHERISH OUR FRIENDSHIP. Sometimes, I do truly forget sending e-card for your birthday or emails to you but it does not mean that I forget your important part in my life. Simpler, you always one of my best friends ever.
5 years living on my own in this busy & crowded city to conveniently pursue my higher academic studying with no family members by my side or any relatives and that my family is about 10-hour away from me by airplane, there is a true friend who is willing to walk with me around the central city to search with me a safe room for me to rent when my old lease is unable to renew for an extension due to an argument with the landlady about her discriminative attitude toward other tenants. And she is the one who always willingly gives her hands to assist me whenever I need help. THANKS SWEETEST SISTER, THANK GOD FOR LEADING YOU TO MY LIFE. Indeed, TO BE YOUR FRIEND IS ONE OF MY GREATEST FORTUNE. In this circumstance, I absolutely agree with your saying “SOMETIMES, IT IS PREFERABLE TO SELL THE FAR-AWAY RELATIVES TO BUY THE NEARBY NEIGHBOURS“.
There was a boy who always willingly left all his work unfinished just to run to me immediately by his bike whenever I called him & telling him that I did need his help. However, this friendship did not last long since he had emigrated with his family to another country which is nearly half-way-around-the-world from the country where I currently live 3 years ago & we had lost our contacts so far. Anyways, THANKS TO BE MY THEN FRIEND though. From my point of view, losing the friendship with you has made no difference from losing one of my invaluable friends. “sigh”
There are some people who are as close as bloodline to me though there are no relative relationships between me & them but there are some who are just like other random strangers.
There are people who extremely hate me or there are a few whom I just don’t want to see them even for a moment of my life.
There are some who have yet to fulfill their promises to me and there are a few whom I have caused them to be disappointed.
There are some ordinary friends acquainted via my friends whom I have just completely forgotten them afterwards. They are the ones who come easily into my life & going out of my life easily .
There is the one who always cares for me & teaches me more than the sum of all my teachers’ or professors’ knowledge or teaching to head my future in the most ethical & virtuous way for a better & happier life. She is the one who cares for me the most or the one who always calls me to remind me to take tablets whenever I caught cold or was sick … though I live away from her 10-hour travel by airplane. MOMMY, I FOREVER OWE YOU AN UNREPAIDABLE LOVE DEBT, I LOVE YOU DEARLY WITH ALL MY HEART. I’M ALWAYS YOUR LITTLE DAUGHTER THOUGH NEARLY LIVING ONE HALF OF MY LIFE. Sometimes, I disobey your teaching, it does not mean that I don’t love you rather than stubbornness is part of my personalities. I could not promise you anything except that I will try my best to live the most ethical & virtuous life like your wish.
There is still the one who does not mind helping me when my life is somewhat “nightmare” & assisting me to clearly spell out the meaning of true friendship which is defined a bit vague in my life’s dictionary.
Above all, THEY ARE SOME (IF NOT ALL) PEOPLE WHO REMIND ME THAT THERE ARE ALWAYS SOMEONE TO MISS, SOME PLACES TO GO WHENEVER I FEEL LONELY, SOMEWHERE TO RETURN WHENEVER I FALL DOWN, SOME ROOMS TO FALL BACK ON WHENEVER MY LIFE GET TOUGHER & TOUGHER, SOME HEARTS THAT ALWAYS TRULY LOVE ME & MAKING ME FEEL DAMN FABULOUS TO BE STOOD UNDER THEIR IMMENSELY HAPPY LOVE SKY.
♪♫♪♫♪♫ ~ … Hold my hand tonight and show me what is right
Make my life complete below the family tree … ~ ♪♫♪♫♪♫